Our whole team (with the exception of a few held back by health issues) was on a fast from food and outside communication this last week. The fast began on Monday after breakfast and ended on Friday at midnight. We were given one meal a day. Monday-Breakfast, Tuesday-Lunch, Wednesday-Dinner, Thursday-No meals, Friday-Breakfast. The purpose in our entire team fasting was more than just spiritual reflection, unity, and commitments. We sought God’s guidance in our upcoming outreach locations and our acceptance of His call. On Monday we were given a list of all three locations for the second semester. (The team was thrilled as most have been waiting impatiently to find out what location they will be headed to in January.) By Wednesday we were to have prayed over the three options, numbered them in order of preference, and turned the list back in. From there, the leadership team will pray over each student and by God’s guidance, develop the teams for each location. The locations are Jeffreys Bay, Swaziland, and Port Elizabeth. Port Elizabeth, and of course Jeffreys Bay, are both in South Africa. Swaziland is its own country, located in Southern Africa.
Day One-Our meal was breakfast. When lunch time rolled around, my body was ready to eat like every other day. I kept having to remind myself that I wasn’t going to be eating when discipleship was over. I felt pretty hungry most of the day. Having never fasted before, I didn’t really know what to expect from this. I had no idea how my body would handle it. During the hours I was at Ithemba, I didn’t have too much time to think about it. (Though, the children were eating when we got there and while their food has never looked appetizing, it did today.) At times I got past the feeling of hunger by drinking water and praying. Meal times I spent in prayer and simple conversation with God. By the time we returned from ministry, I had no energy and felt pretty hungry. I noticed throughout the day, as tired as I was, that I was more aware of what God was doing around me.The rest of the evening I spent in stillness with God. It was one of the most peaceful nights I’ve had here. I prayed wisdom about the three locations and a few other specific things.
Day Two-Our meal was lunch. I awoke at the normal time. Since there was no breakfast, there was no reason to leave the cabin until meal time. I got ready and climbed back on my bed, put in my headphones, and began praying. I asked for guidance again about the three locations. I know which location holds my heart, but I’m praying to see His. I’ve felt called to stay in Jbay since the night we drove in and have felt confirmation since. However, I want to make sure that’s Him and not me, speaking for Him. I had no problem with feeling hungry today. I am loving all this extra time I’m spending with God in prayer. It is making such a huge difference. Later on in the evening we had a time of worship. I lifted up the three locations again and some time into worship I felt God was giving me my answer. I went back to my cabin and filled out my paper. What location I end up in now is between God and my leaders.
Day Three-Our meal was dinner. The day before, upon returning from ministry I was having a hard time physically with the fast. I was feeling pretty weak and exhausted. That was even more aggravated today. It was extremely difficult to make it to ministry, stay checked in while there, and make it back. I felt as if I were going to pass out several different times. Having never fasted before, I didn’t know beforehand where my limits would be. Knowing me the way that I do, I decided I needed to stop pushing myself harder than I could handle. I ate our normal one meal and made the decision to resume eating “regularly” on Thursday.
Day Four-The official the day of no meals. However, I joined the ranks of those who couldn’t fast for medical reasons and ate lunch and dinner. Breakfast I didn’t partake in, so that I could spend that time in prayer and reflection with God. (My fast would personally still continue to be from coffee and carbonated drinks, which I had not mentioned before.) Although the meal aspect of my fast changed, I still felt as if I was in a “fasting” state of mind with the Lord. I continued to feel as if I was more aware of the things He was doing in me and around me. At Ithemba, Allulutho (the name I now know to be correct for the girl I work one-on-one with) played on the playground and smiled as she slid down! That was huge. She’s not played on the playground once since we’ve been here. I’m going to assume that she’s also never played on it since she has been attending Ithemba. She smiles every day when she sees me now. She also comes up to me instead of me having to pursue her. God is doing so much in this little girl!! I’m excited to see what more He has in store for her. Maybe in the coming month, she will speak to me.
Day Five-The meal for the whole team was breakfast. I know many of my teammates loved the fast and what they learned out of it. That said, I don’t think any of them were sad about eating “normally” on Saturday. 🙂 In fact, I know a few people prepared to be awake at midnight when the fast ended-so that they could have chocolate or whatnot. I found that amusing, especially since I hate chocolate and don’t eat it. (Some of you just found that out for the first time. Yes, there are a few of us in the world, even a few women, that don’t like chocolate. 😉 I’m sorry if I’ve just wrecked everything you knew to be true and good.) Despite having some awful pain issues with my knee this last week, unrelated to the fast of course, I loved the fast. It was hard on my body and I now know I cannot fast for that long at a time. However, I learned so much about God this last week. I also learned how much better our relationship could be if I’d just give Him the time of day, literally. I’m so excited to head into this next week with the commitments and knowledge I have now, ready to be the change I want to see.
